Letters from Schietztreun Acres

Owl in a Pot!

2011-08-28T15:19:00.000-04:00

We did save him, and are taking him to the conservancy, poor tired thing.

OOps, there's 2!

2011-08-28T15:14:00.000-04:00

Rooster in the Feed Bucket!

2011-08-28T15:12:00.000-04:00

Never Underestimate the Tendency to Bolt

2011-02-16T19:26:00.002-05:00

I thought that quote was about me, I'd glanced at a book in Costco and inside it saw that quote, and bought the book. So this morning, I'm looking at it closer, and beneath the abovementioned chapter title, was the first sentence, attributing the quote to Pema Shodron, a Buddist Monk/teacher (as I understand it), and darned, if I hadn't met her one time in California years ago, courtesy of my friend Smartypants, quite by accident, when I got invited to lunch and swimming the next day at a farm she where she spends time in the summer! Flash forward 5 miutes, after I'd called my friend Chrisanne and told her of the strange coincidence.

I went outside, the birds were making a ruckus, and the one most distraught was a female pheasant, newly widowed. We'd thought it a bright idea to throw another male in there, evidently too soon, and she was freaked. I opened the door to change her water and talk to her, and she did what. Bolted. Never happened before, and after standing out in the open, sort of dazed, when I went after her, she took off flying, maybe 25 feet in the air, to a tree wayyyyyy in the back. I calmly trekked to the back, keeping my eyes on the general area, soon seeing glimpses of her on the ground, then just weeds moving and I caught her by the back fence, after plowing thru all kinds of burrs and brambles, but I got her. She could have gone thru the holes in the back fence, but thank gosh she gave it up when she did. She's brown in a brown world back there, we'd never of found her. I returned her to the cage, put the unwanted male in his old palace, and am leaving her to mourn in her own way. alone til she gets bored.

So the bolting thing wasn't about me. For now.

A load of new Baybeeeez.

2011-01-14T09:26:00.004-05:00

She had so many I had to put them in a giant washtub. I put a light
on them because it was cold there in the guesthouse, (she'd snuck
in a broken door, and put em in a tin bucket) and now they're all
around the light, not under her, but silkies make ferocious moms,
and they'll be ok. Nobody will bother them in there for now, that is
until they decide to climb out, causing me to put them outside.
I think they'll go in a big cage for now, no use tempting the possums
and spotted skunks that cause most carnage around here.

Peahen on the Porch

2010-11-07T08:47:00.004-05:00

Mr. Peacock lost his wife of many years, how do you tell a grown peahen that just eating the sunflower seeds out of the food is not good for her? Well, we got babies, hoping one would be a female that could eventually be his wife. We raised them initially in the bathroom of the guesthouse, and what a mess. I brought them out when they could take some cooler air, to the back porch, giving them the attention they deserved, but the day came when I had to let them run free. They were now a match for curious cats, and bigger than the chickens. I did lose the weaker of the two I had, one day I came up to the back door, finding it wide open (damn dogs do the knob) and both peahens on the kitchen counter. My luck and theirs, I had made the perfect chocolate sauce for ice cream, it was on the counter, now all over the counter, and I do think that chocolate and bird do not mix. One got sick and shortly passed, the other one was so devoted to her friend that I had one heck of a time separating the two, I pulled a trash can over to the cage, put the deceased bird on the top of the can, and the other would sit watch next to it. When she got down to eat, I'd put a piece of newspaper on the bird, so she could still see it, and I'd wait. I put more paper on as she got up and down, and eventually I had it covered up and wrapped, and she never knew when I substituted a newpaper wrapped soda bottle. Bink handled the burial, and then in a few days, the paper blew off the bottle and Priscilla, as my friend Chrisanne has named her, didn't notice that I put the bottle and the paper in the recycle bin and life resumed. Thank gosh for short memory spans.

She now lives on top of the dove cage by the back door, she finally followed me, one time, to the big aviary in back where future-husband lives, I don't know whether to let him out or just put her in there eventually after more meetups, but I think she'll be horrified to be in a cage, and he'd be happy to run around outside the aviary, but omg. TWO peacocks on the porch? It'll be up to my ankles trying to get in the back door! Although there is a wood panel on the top of the doves, they've been annointed by just being in the right place at the right time, poor kids. I do put basins of water in there for them to take baths, which they use efficiently, but still. Yuk. Peacocks are BIG birds!

Oh Good Lord, What Chaos Ensues When I Don't Post.

2010-09-24T00:17:00.005-04:00

It's been since May, and farm life goes on.
Grisly and stunning at the same time.

We lost Macho, the 33 year old horse, We had the vet come and give him what I call the "Blue Juice" and he was surrounded by the other animals, the goats parked themselvesat an appropriate distance, Precious the mini horse talked to him all the way thru it, and Chalupy the burro stood by him til the end. What a great Paso Fino he was, all casual all the time.

We acquired 2 baby peahens, of which I think one is not. One has aquired color, the other is plain. oops. We wanted two for the male we have. I'll have to go to the auction and correct this on my own. I decided to let them out of their cage, they are about 1/3-1/2 grown, and it seemed cruel to not let them experience the world of bugs they crave, so the first night,we herded them back to where their cage was and put them back up on top of it, they are spooky and don't seem to own a brain between themselves...because the second night, they decided to sleep in the bushes. I figured a cold wet night was in order, so I turned on the sprinklers, and at about 3 am, they were wishing they were back up on the cage, as they did show up the following night. And tonight. I now have to figure out what to do with them when they're huge.

The partridges are finally back in their rebuilt aviary, I couldn't find them today, had a heart attack for a minute trying to find them in there, it's not that big! I crawled around on my hands and knees looking thru the underbrush, and there they were, King had built a nest for his wife, and he was in it, trying it out, and she was sitting quietly outside the nest, probably
hissing "hurry up, it's coming out!" I think they share parental responsibilities with eggs, but I've never had the opportunity to have any mate yet, well, successfully. Wish us luck.

Then, a couple of weeks ago, Mona the poodle lost her battle with a bum mitral valve. At age 11, he had a heart attack, and died. She ran around, played, was just normal as pie, with a heart that went "squoosh squoosh" rather than a normal heartbeat. We knew this was coming, but as she was happy and running around, we didn't know it would be this soon. I"ve spent this week making a Mona Zone near the front gate where she used to wait for me patiently. I planted her there, with a mango tree on top, and am putting flowers in all around, it seems fitting, as she deserves it. She was underappreciated in that you don't miss your shadow til it's gone, you realize you look where you're walking to step over her and she's not in her usual place, you miss that head in your hand whenever you walk anywhere, you notice that she's not out the door in front of you when you hear a wierd noise at night, she used to do that without me saying a word, because she already knew why we were going out.

I always compared her to my former dog, Pooka, who was a legend. Pooka had more personality, but Mona had more loyalty. Pooka was vindictive. Like running away the minute she saw me pull out a suitcase. Mona just heaved a sigh. How lucky I was to have 2 great dogs. I see so many dogs that never tune in.

Somebody gave us an excellent dog a few months back, and other than jumping on the cats for no reason outside, and bullying the passive peahens, she's wonderful. She's Nico's dog, Squinks the Peruvian Hairless is Bink's. Her name is Pebbles, which i keep trying to change to Pickles, but she really only hears "Pebbles" ... I don't know why she's being inflexible about this. She's a Schnauzer-Poodle like Pooka was, but more Schnauz than Poo.

It all goes by too fast. Thats why no post since May, just eeking out a living in times like this takes so much effort. Effort that is not necessarily directed towards the farm or even my artwork. I'd post what art I did do during this time, but it's not anything done of my own free will, it's stuff I had to do, but I do have stuff coming up I'm excited about doing, and I'm also trying really hard to free up more space here at the farm to do it. Cleaning House, so to speak, and its all good. Onwards and upwards.

They Stayed.

2010-05-03T00:13:00.002-04:00

Am I the only one who gets spay and neuter certificates for Christmas? So finally they're all done, YudaKitty, Goofy, Crabby, Pootie and Tummydot. I went to give one away, and my sis says, OH, you can't give THAT one away, that one's the puppy's cat. HUH? She showed me, Pootie sits still, and her two puppies bounce off of it, I saw the only cat on the planet to stay still for that kind of abuse, and the most emotion it showed was to turn its head, while they chewed on its ears, well, that one can't go. SO, Yudakitty was the one who crawled up her pajama legs every morning, so thats my favorite too, so it can't go. Crab is good with the chickens and birds, its ok, Tummy Dot is my husband's other dog, it can't go. Goofy is just that, amusing, and so thats that. Summer is here, they're all out and about, almost invisible cats, as opposed to the winter pic above. Mama Arcadia is neutered, and we got Hello Kitty back from the first litter, he's neutered too, but looks just like his dad, Richard, who we lost July 5th. SO. We had Pike, Brotherinlaw John's cat, she's fine, but we lost Bolie the other day, ancient and decrepit, she just wandered off into the sunset, but not before saying goodbye, meeting me at the gate when I brought Bink back from the school bus. That was like 4:30, I went in to make dinner and she was gone. She was a nice cat.

Wads of Kittens

2009-11-24T12:17:00.004-05:00

and I put my etsy stuff on here, its a good thing.

The kittens are asking if they can stay.

2009-11-16T01:11:00.002-05:00

Good Lord, its been since August? It flew. So did our oak tree in the back yard, it flew right into my aviary for the partridges. My son took a movie of the collateral damage, and I did one of the cleanup, I doubt I'll be able to maintain this reporterly discipline when it comes to rebuilding the thing, as it'll doubtlessly be done in dribs and drabs, or whenever the partridges get militant about having their house back.

Bink's version:

Mine:

Dog Days of August.

2009-08-03T01:41:00.003-04:00

Mona the standard poodle is almost 11. My son wanted a dog of his own, and I saw on Craigslist, somebody had a Peruvian Hairless dog. Now, my husband is Mexican, and he told me stories about an ancient breed called a Xolosquintle, but he just called it a Squinkly. There's yer name, dawg. Actually, dogette, as she's 10 weeks, has a little unbilical hernia and some fuzz on the ears which of course, in dogdom, disqualifies her as Squinkly champ of the planet, but just flawed enough to fit in. She slept all the way home on her back on my son's lap, cept for the romp at the rest area on I-75, and she did well, not straying too far, and coming back to us when we called, she loved running with the Bink, and hopefully, now that we've had her a few days, she'll start listening to the cluephone about the peepees and the poopies outside. What. What. What was I thinking? (i was thinking it'd be neat to have one)

We shall see. I'll be able to put my full attn on it when Bink starts school soon. Til then, she'll be livin the life of Riley, along with Bink. For now.

Corkscrew Swamp Sanctuary, April 2009

2009-04-02T21:17:00.002-04:00

This is a day trip we took last weekend, with my childhood friend Keith, Bink and his friend Travis to Corkscrew Swamp Sanctuary, a few miles from here. Drought has concentrated all the wildlife! From the tiny feeder fish, to the protected wood stork, they are all are in the only areas left with water. It cost $10 each and $4 for the kids, I'd say it was well worth our while, we saw a hawk sail over our heads and take out a rat, in the grass, we didn't have a chance to film that. The amount of wildlife we saw that day was amazing. April is a great month for the parks here, but bad in that there has been little or no rain for months, and this is supposed to be the tropics! Pretty arid here in April, it didn't used to be,... its all changing constantly.

Pregnant Goats, Spring has Sprung.

2009-02-20T15:22:00.003-05:00

Bonita had two babies, a boy and a girl right before Christmas. She was a terrible first time mother, not the worst I've seen, but we did have to take that colostrum by force, and keep the babies in the house at times, lucky for us, they didn't care if it were mothers milk or cow milk, they took whatever was available. She ignored the boy, as he must have come first, way out in the back, and she had the girl in the hog shed. My son found her and the baby, and while I was sitting with them, I heard that plaintive wail I'd heard before, baby lost in the woods. It's chilling. I ran got him, and showed him to her, and she ran off. !!! She eventually got it that it was hers, but never did nurse either of them much. Next time.

The pics above are Chloe's new babies, Lorraine and her brother, he is the camel colored one with white spots, almost identical to Bonita's boy. They both look like their dad, Al. As soon as I knew they were all pregnant, I sold Al to a friend, because I didn't want him re-doing them all the instant they gave birth. (not that fast but fast) Chloe's had babies before, and is a great mom.

Earline should blow any day now, Wheezy, her mother is next, Carmela and Zoey are both pregnant.....that a total of 12 possible new goatie babies. AAAAAAAAAAAA!

And the pregnant ones are crabby!!!

Where I Live

2009-02-11T08:45:00.005-05:00

It's jungly here, and tree frogs abound. I had one jump and land on my face one time, screaming was NOT an option, as its feet were there, and its body on my nose, and its little hands were grasping my glasses and forehead. The strangest feeling on the planet, I'll tell you. But I digress.

Some jungle I planted, some was here, some are pure fantasy, it works!

If momma ain't happy ain't nobody happy.

2009-01-26T14:29:00.003-05:00

That's what the sign says on my chikn coop:

When Pigs Fly

2009-01-08T12:46:00.003-05:00

last week at the auction a pig got loose and rampaged thru the crowd,
sorry i missed it. The pigs get VERY loud and HATE any sort of change
to their routine, and they can jump a 4' fence if they feel like it,
or just crash thru like that one did. I made the guys a new sign.

December's List for January and a PRINT!

2008-12-04T11:19:00.006-05:00

This Print's for sale! It's 6.5 x 9.5, give or take, and it's
a signed, limited edition of 250, of Bueller, the baby steer.
Everybody calls it Bueller, but I call it Cow. It looks like
a cow to me. I am totally uneducated as to the correct terminology,
so I get away with a lot. It's $45. plus $5. ship, cool beans!

Anyone who buys one that is a friend gets
the Schietztreun Discount. Whatever that is.

AND thank you Jenny, (she bought the original)!
----

Ok, this blog has been a poquito sporadic, sometimes things go on that just apall me, sometimes I get busy, and most times, I'm just a TAD scattered, but there are still so many stories going on around me here. I'd like to make a list of stuff that I'd like to talk about and/or draw, for 2009.

Lefty the Parakeet
The Partrige Family in my backyard
Building Aviaries!
Lorraine and her crusty ol husband the Peacock
The Red Golden Pheasants, Max and Joanne
Richard the Volunteer Cat
How to sure-fire give away a Kitten

Wish me luck!

The King of Schietztreun Acres

2008-11-12T20:38:00.007-05:00

This is no ordinary rabbit.

He has singlehandedly saved over 10 chickens and 5 baby rabbits, twice.

I'm totally serious.

Months ago, a woman gave me some rabbits to sell. A bunch of colored dwarfs, cute, and one giganto white momma. New Zealand White. The night before we were to sell the rabbits, all of a sudden big momma makes a nest, pulls her own hair out to do it, and by morning, had several tiny white baby rabbits. Some didn't make it, I was anxious, so I read up on babies, I was considering messing around with them, as she didn't look like she was feeding them! Turns out rabbits don't feed them but once or so a day!!! Not the most attentive moms, as they don't go chase them and gather them back, either, much.

We sold all the brothers and sisters, and most of the colored rabbits, eventually, but felt that this one was special. He escaped his pen, when he was a teenager-in-rabbit-years, but was easily picked up, as he had no fear of either the dogs or the cats or us. He has the run of the yard now, any time I go out during the day, I have absolutely no idea where he is. He might be under the woodpile, he might have burrowed himself half to China under the Bougainvillea, the one with the thorns that prevent anyone from going there. I don't know. He was impossible to keep in, other than lock him up in a hutch, and he generally stuck around, so we set him free.

At night tho, that's a different story. We had to put a plank up next to his girlfriend, as he likes to sleep next to her, she's in a hutch, so we had to elevate his perch. We did have her on a stand, and there was a board sticking out, and he probably fell off many times while we weren't looking, as it was too small for him to lay on and chat her up comfortably.

I often work late, as I am nocturnally challenged, always have been, and sometimes I hear noises, and go out and check, and sometime I don't, and go out in the morning to utter devastation, if a raccoon has visited silently. Things happen here, more things than I would ever care to talk about, as its a bummer. Life is like this, there are horror shows with farm animals that force the more tender hearted into their condominiums with no pet rules, they close the door and lock it and the life and death process is effectively hidden from them for awhile. Here it's more in your face.

Like when the raccoon took our beloved Polish Rooster only 20 feet where Nico was working on something in his shop. Snatched it right out of the hen house. From a perch! Nico ran to the house for a flashlight, but could only hear it now, in the far distance, and we never did find it. Then one morning a raccoon did some massive damage to some really cute young quail, causing Nico such consternation, arriving upon the carnage, that he tore off into the woods in his underwear, granted it was 6 in the morning, but if he'd seen the raccoon, he was of a firm mindset to pick up a rock, and he was so mad that if he had, he could have taken it out of a tree a hundred feet away and 20 foot up, I have no doubt. His anger makes him damn accurate. Mine makes me nothing but incoherent.

So, back to the bunny. We've had attacks that caused no noise, as I said. It was 2 am on a lovely quiet night. I stepped out on to the patio from my studio, and Bunnificent is coming at me fast. He screeches to a stop in front of me, on the sidewalk. He sits straight up like a rod is through his whole body, ears straight up, wild eyed. In an instant he took off running towards my husband's workshop, 30 feet away. I actually, i kid you not, said out loud "Whatsa matter, Lassie, did Timmy fall down the well again?" Turns out he had.

I walked after the rabbit, and within 10 feet noticed that there was a bucket full of eggs that a chicken had been nesting on for the last almost 3 weeks, and she wasn't on it. !!!!?

That right there was worrisome, as they never leave the nest at night. I walked over and felt the eggs. They were absolutely hot, like she had JUST left. I walked further, and the rabbit was no where to be seen, but there, in front of the closed chicken coop door, 20 feet ahead of me, was the chicken. In shock, she was bleeding out one ear, and one eye was starting to swell shut. Something had attacked her, and I didn't hear or see one thing. At this point she never would have returned to the nest, she was in one of those zones where they just go into some fugue state, while they decide whether they will live or die. I had just had another Silkie chicken this happened to days before, she'd decided not to finish her eggs, (only 2, but i felt bad anyway) after she'd been attacked and cut very badly. I bandaged the newly-injured white chicken like I did the Silkie, and knew that she would do what the Silkie had done, pumped full of Neosporin and all bandaged up, she'd just stand there deciding. In one place for days. Luckily I'd started our incubator just a few days before, regulating the temp, so all the eggs were saved. I just stuck them in the incubator.

I now had 2 shocky chickens, and one marvelously talented rabbit. He had come to get me, I was wondering if I should call him Lassie, but he was even better than that.
He needed no praise, he just wanted outdoor food and water, the run of the place and carrots. We see him all over, like he has some circuit that he runs, 5 pm, he's by the gate, waiting for us all to come home from work, at 11 he's with the girlfriend.

The babies hatched, and I had these 2 wounded chickenmoms, each had lost their will to set on their eggs, and both seemed totally shell shocked. (is there a pun there?) So, when the babies were in the brooder, I thought to myself, hell, maybe both of em could regain their will to live if I put them in the brooder with all these babies. Maybe they'll share em.

They did. Slowly the Silkie started moving around, showing them how to eat and scratch, but they crawled under the stoic white chicken to sleep. In a few months, they were all outside, the Silkie kept the mother thing going the longest, and they both recovered just fine. They've both since had more babies, and stayed with it for the course.

Back to Bunnificent. We mated the girlfriend dwarf bunny to another small bunny, I guess he didn't care, as he liked the boyfriend. The boyfriend was given to a friend after that, as I thought maybe Bunnificent would take a shine to the babies. He did.

He must have considered them his own, with no actual contact, except for twice by accident. Our learning curve at times is a flat line, I am sure of it. Not always, as we do have some talent at keeping things alive, but this time we did have massive brain failure.

I can't remember who found this scenario. The babies when they were born were all so tiny, we forgot, that they might fall out the holes in the bottom of the cage. I forgot how much they move around!!! The huge part of this story is that usually if baby bunnies that small fall out, there are any number of chickens that see this, and they are omnivores, that is, that they eat ANYTHING. We'd lost rabbits to them before, and just plain forgot. Well, they did fall out of the bottom of the cage. All 5. Who came to their rescue? Bunnificent. When we found him, he'd made a nest for them out of his own hair. He was determined that the chickens weren't getting these. How strange is that? A MALE? pulling his own chest hair out. We were amazed.

Then we did something really stupid. We piled hay around the outside of the cage, and more on the bottom, and the next day, the same thing happened. Flatline. Again, Bunnificent to the rescue. Dug a hole, fur lined, ready to defend babies and keep them warm. I've never noticed even the mother rabbit retrieving a baby, if they wander off, thats it. but this rabbit of ours has earned a place of respect I don't think that even the dogs have reached yet. I watch him sometimes playing with our cat, and think, how cool is that. He is one of all of us. He's always putting himself out there, engaged. There is something totally charming about seeing him out of the corner of your eye, an Alice in Wonderland fantasy, he knows you see him. He's everywhere. I also thank him for being a New Zealand White! When he is full grown, he's going to be huge. He's definitely big now, but probably will be twice the size he is now, and there is no hawk around, nor owl who'd want to mess with that. I've seen foxes and reports of coyotes, but he seems to know how to disappear into the woodwork, literally, and his brain is no average rabbit brain.

He will have the life he wants, and as many carrots as he wants, he's earned it.

Cow down, cow up.

2008-05-12T00:59:00.004-04:00

He's not a cow. He's a steer. I found that out. We had him fixed immediately, rambunctious devil that he is. My sis took this pic with her phone, when he's hungr he's insistent.

Lots going on, someone gave me ANOTHER pot bellied pig, and a friend took him to another friend who had a girl or two for him to try on. ha. Pics of Mr.Smiley when he gets back from Club Med.

Aviaries to be built! We have a huge pool cage of aluminum that someone gave us, and that augmented with PT that we have, and even some of the cypress that fell in hurricane Wilma will ensure a sturdy structure. There has to be the main structure and an anteroom, called a "mancatcher"...so that if one gets out when you open the door, it'll still be inside.

I've already built a large holding pen for husband's Red Golden Pheasants, they're happy altho a tad bored, seems. I have a pair of Coturnix quail in there with them as companions, but they seem invisible to each other. That beats the opposite, some breeds don't get along. I think finches and small flighty birds would be fine with the Partridges, I don't want anyone bigger and mean. I don't even think I'd put the quail in with them, the species is too close, and they'd compete for floor space. I think the partridges perch up at night, so there will be small trees and bushes planted for that. More Later.

Cow got very sick last week, scours. I think we switched him too fast on bad advice and replacement milk....a night spent up with him down was awful. I gave him any fluids i could, electrolytes and about 5 am, his nose was wet again. I went to bed and he was up and running around the next day. He had a bad 24 hrs or so. I even had to shoot him up with antibiotics, he didn't care for that, but was too weak to protest. I had to drag him out of the poo by his front feet to the clean stray, and I was glad he was only a month old. There will be no draggin him anywhere in a month.

Mothers Day was great. The honeydo list was out and I was command central. Oh it was great.

New Arrivals!

2008-05-07T13:48:00.001-04:00

Redefining the Word Cowboy

2008-04-24T09:59:00.003-04:00

I can't believe its been so long since I've posted. I am remiss.

We've done a lot here in this time, aviaries, selling and buying,
profits, losses. Christmas came and went along with new years,
the only constant here is change.

Well, isn't that true anyway?

As complex as the quandry is, it sure makes for fun drawing and even
more fun movies. Especially with our new calf, I hesitate to name him,
as DO NOT GET ATTATCHED is not a good name.

He's 2 weeks old today!

I don't know if the procedure that our Dairy Industry uses to get rid
of their male cows born to their milk cows is right or what. We went
to a local auction to sell some excess roosters. There in a cage to
be sold, we saw baby baby cows. HUH? Where's their moms? Still at the
dairy making MILK! I was horrified, and these babies were auctioned off
for next to nothing. BUT. Better the babies are sold rapidly, as
they were, and they were very healthy. (altho hungry) Better that they
are sold than the chance of being immediate dog food. Better that I
give this little dorky thing the chance for a little bit of life, some
joy, for as long as he has, than none at all, thats my rationalization
for all of this.

I am over my head here, as I have no IDEA whether
I can afford to keep him, its ok now, its just milk, but in the future
when he's 800 lbs, I don't know. I will have to see if he's still as
gentle (I doubt he will be) I will have to see if he eats a bale a day
as bales of hay here are costly, we have no good grass for cows, they
need supplement. Plus grain. More Ethanol, pls, mr BUSH DAMMIT. NOT!
The feed prices have gone up like 20% in the last month!

All in all, the future is all unknowns. The art biz is ok, we're scrappin
just like everybody else, but I don't feel particularly bleak. For now
we're fine, alls well at schietztreun acres.

Married/NoKids

2007-09-27T20:51:00.000-04:00

Yes, thats how it is. 24/7, always together. She never goes in with
the other chickens at night. She stays with him. She defends him,
she scares away even the horses, if somebody tries to take some food
away. I think he loves the company,and the fact that she has really
sharp toenails.

I was posessed to draw this the other night, and altho he looks a bit
grisly, I think its how he looks. He is very happy. I drew it on a
crane envelope. At least its nice paper. I liked the
color of the envelope.

Ebola Zaire Blum

2007-09-10T10:35:00.000-04:00

In the last 2 mo. I've added 2 cats to my repertoire, along with Pike the owl-catcher. Bolie, as seen above, is a very nice shy cat that lives in my guesthouse, til she gets more aquainted with the wildlife and understands the rules. She's venturing outside more, and is actually conversing with Pike on a regular basis. Pike is counfounded more by the new baby than she is with Bolie. More pics to follow. later. when i remember.

I made a slideshow!

2007-09-04T23:56:00.000-04:00

I want more people to know about my calligraphy, I have
a good time doing it, and it comes easily to me, as long
as someone adores the style, and doesn't try to make me
conform to some rigid thing they've already seen. I will
hook up some links tomarrow to my site, and then I'll have
something to refer people to. The last job I did was for
Hermes, they opened a store here. Happy for the opportunity!

Night Blooming Cereus

2007-08-28T00:04:00.000-04:00

I Hate it when I don't post.

2007-08-16T16:47:00.001-04:00

I went to Colorado, then I went to see the Space Shuttle take off.

It is one of the neatest things mankind has accomplished, I am stunned by it every time. I want to get as close as I can to it, to hear it and feel it, the way you feel the base drum go by in the parade, and have it echo into your stomach. I can see it take off from down the street here, like 250 miles away, but its like a welders torch flame 2 blocks away. I've driven the trip like 6 times now, to only see it take off three times. I saw the one that blew up, running back and forth to the house to see why it suddenly stopped, I stood outside boo hooing with the rest of the country.

We have new chickn babies, and the hen took the chikns and left the nest. I cleaned out what eggs didn't hatch, and upon carrying the eggs to the trash, i heard the distinct sound of peeping. Horror-stricken (chickens can do that to you) I searched the trash, thru exploded eggs, thru trash, and had to lay all the eggs out in the driveway while i held my breath, to find the peeping egg. FINALLY i got it, put it in a box with a light on it, and behold. A new house chicken. The others were a good 3 days older, there was no way to put this one with the others. It couldnt keep up, much less her rejecting it. This one is now a few weeks old, and still hasn't shut up. I never heard a chicken talk so much. I have no idea if its a boy or girl, but it is incredibly independent and is not much for being held, but wants to run along wherever we go, and its hard to watch your feet and walk. My husband is trying to teach it to sit, we'll see. I would keep him/her in the house more, but it talks constantly. Not the annoying peep peep type "i need attn" but more a constant rattle of chikn conversation. Wish me luck.

We had an odd event. A chicken here seems to have fallen in love with the pig. They sleep together, all nestled up, and she guards his food, I've seen her fly up at the burro, and he ran off. She walks around all puffed out, like he's her baby or something, and I caught this video on my phone.

More news as it plays out, here at S.A.

Somebody's Gettin' this for Xms

2007-07-05T02:32:00.001-04:00

Not a great scan, but it's ok, it's sold.

Aud's on a Roll

2007-06-13T01:02:00.000-04:00

Part of the second mural for Mansion La Palma in Bay Colony.
It's over the top. It's a pool bath, why not have some fun.

I saw this at a friend's house and had to paint it.

SummerJazz '07

2007-06-05T10:03:00.000-04:00

I think maybe that I've been doing this poster for around 12 years straight? Somebody tell me.
(I live in a world with no concept of time)
This one will make a great T shirt, go to http://www.cafepress.com/audreyheffner
Give me a minute to get it up there.

Armadillos Have Shrek Ears.

2007-05-31T10:25:00.000-04:00

This baby was 6" long, Nico found it at work!

Our Impenetrable Fence

2007-05-27T00:05:00.001-04:00

Our yard is totally fenced, and this is about the 5th one so
far. This one, tho, was huge. Did he know there was a lake
3 fences and a brushpile away? We turned the hose on for
him and he drank, then Dad and Bink took him to the lake,
in a chickn bucket.

An armadillo visited again last night, made so much noise
I KNEW he'd never hear the back door squeak, so I snuck
out and sat on a stone wall and waited for him. They don't
bite, right? He came within 3 feet of me, and stood up like
a bunny, decided something was just not right, and he
scooted off, not really in a hurry, but kind of nervous.
I could hear him across the yard scrapin' around for bugs.

There's more chicken babies, one so far has disappeared
and another almost disappeared yesterday. We had a
wind storm, it knocked over things in the yard, notably 2
sheets of plywood resting on the fence. What would be the
chance that at that very moment, a chicken baby would be
walking by? This ends good. Don't panic. Yes.
The plywood fell over on the grass, and the chicken baby
was under it, BUT. What saved the chickn baby was
the fact that there had been a rake against the plywood,
which landed tines up under the plywood, and guess who
was found up against the tines? Yes, a perfectly healthy
but frustrated baby chikn that had been sitting in one place
for at least 4 hrs. Her legs were a bit stiff, but she found
her mother in 2 seconds and was out eating immediately.
We were amazed.

King of the Hill

2007-05-26T10:51:00.000-04:00

Dogs I Have Known

2007-05-26T10:06:00.002-04:00

Top, there's my
sister's little poodle,
then a pic I painted
before we ever got
the dog called Cecil,
and the chromosomically
challenged Irish Setter.
I painted these for
notecards years ago,
and was amused when
I found a couple of them
in a box recently.

New Mural

2007-05-10T12:11:00.000-04:00

Pool Bath, Men's Room, Mansions La Palma in Bay Colony, Pelican Bay, Naples FL. whoo. Long name. Took about a week, as I kept going back, the place is absolutely a beautiful place to be. The manager had seen another mural I had done, and he contacted me. Ralph Sanchez, thank you. I have another one to do for them, for the women's, a florida beach one, and I can do that at home. Oh, and that bottom right square is a mirror.

It's about 4 x 8' and so is the other. I forgot to paint the flag before I took the pic!

It's the 18th hole at the Bay Colony Golf Course. Hurricane Wilma took all the trees and shoved them to lean to the left. A lot of my trees at the house lean now too. I made the title of this post a link to the big version. I like the water and the retaining wall.

A Squeak in the Woods

2007-04-24T08:57:00.000-04:00

Man, we thought Wheezy the goat was pregnant, but my sis called me to tell me that she'd had a miscarriage. I asked if she was sure, and yes, she was. She bury'd it, and had an appt. she had to go to, but I was on my way home, and she asked that I check on the goat when I got home. Of course, when I got home, I forgot, as there was someone in my driveway who wanted to talk to me about a job, and I sat on the back porch with him discussing it.

We were in the middle of that chat, when I heard that call, WAY OUT BACK....all the goats were lined up at the front of the fence, this had nothing to do with them, this was a sound I'd heard before, and at that moment talking to the guy, I must have gone white. Eyes wide, I stood up without explanation, and took off like a rocket for the back. He's yellin' "WHAT WHAT!" All I could do was hold up a finger, I was worried I'd jinx what it was that I heard. Hope against hope I'm fumbling with the gate chain, I loop it back around the gate, hope the goats don't escape and go to haul ass, but I hear nothing. I stop. I wait. I hear it again, and take 5 steps. I stop. I wait, I walk, I hear it again, quickstepping towards the sound, and I see the tree where we put my dad's ashes,(his name was Earl) I walk behind that tree, and there she is. Half covered with the sack she was born in, her one eye is plastered, dry, and one ear, Wheezy must have licked her for just a moment and then totally freaked out. The baby goatie is essentially dry under the sticky spoo that covered her rear half, and i scooped her up and it came off on me, i threw it as far as i could, and it slid off her eye and ear, and the baby was soooo happy to see me. She was rooting around, a great sign, she was healthy and I was so relieved. I thought seeing she was behind the Earl tree, the name was Earline. Tacky 'nuff?

I came walking up to the fence, as the guy who I ran off on was walking back to the fence. OMG! He yells, Who's is that!!?? I told him Wheezys! She had come by us to see the baby, but when I set the baby down, she took off, like , don't get that thing near me! It HURT!

Bill, the guy's name, totally flips out. He says, That goat is goanna starve! What do i get it? Where do i get it? I told him Colostrum, baby goat food and a baby bottle, and he was gone.
My husband came home, and after having gotten the miscarriage message on the phone, he was crazy happy. I called my sis, who was at a concert. I held the phone out, let it ring, and when she picked up, the baby goatie made a baby goatie wail that made my sister run out of the concert hall to the lobby. It was truly a very happy moment. There is nothin' like a baby goat. Sweet, immediately headstrong, warm, fuzzy, docile. CUTE!

We took her into the house after several rebuffs by the mom, and I'm thinkin, o GAWD i don't want a house goat, it has taken me forever to get a chicken we raised in the house to understand (partially) that she is not entitled, but thats all I need, all my mango leaves gone, all my flowers eaten, cause we raised a goat to be up by the house. I don't think so.

We decided on a plan of action, we had to tackle the wild mom goat. Got'er. I had to milk a goat for the first time in my life while Nico held her, and was underwhelmed by the quantity, but that colostrum within the first few hours is really essential for the baby. The baby, upon arriving at the house, was totally cleaned by Mona the Poodle, who assumed that it was now HERS and I am surprised that this fixed dog didn't lactate. She cornered the baby goat on her bed an slept with her. She's never done that, she won't even touch the black lab when she sleeps.

While this happened around 4 pm, the birthing part had happened maybe an hour earlier, and now it was getting to be 11 at night, and she'd not eaten yet. When my sis came home from the concert, she picked up the bottle i'd made (Bill was back from the store in a flash, with baby goat food, a huge tub of goat milk substitute, and a baby bottle from Kmart.) the baby ate like a pig. We were all hugely proud of ourselves, and decided that the mother goat might be receptive to somebody to empty her huge milk bag which must have hurt like hell... if we locked em up together. The baby naturally has a rooting instinct, and if they were together, the baby can smell where the milk is, if Wheezy would let her near her. We trapped her in the barn, and as there is no door, we boarded em up, with a little pan of water and food for the mom and straw down for a clean place to sleep. (You can't put a deep pan of water down near any new baby anything) Sure as hell, the baby nursed, Wheezy acquiesced from pain, and for a week we kept them together. Wheezy is still not sure what the heck happened to her.

She still looks at the baby like, WHY? She gets concerned if she can't see the baby, makes noises, but nothing like an experienced mom would... moms that are used to it continuously talk to their babies, and their licking stimulates the babies to nurse. Wheez still has never licked the baby, I think that the Poodle spit was too much of an insult to take. Next time.

Clik on the title of this post to see my Nico and Earline Movie, its a Quicktime 10M, so it loads slow, but I think worth it. ha.

The Flowers Want Equal Billing

2007-03-09T13:47:00.000-05:00

There's only like 2 days a year here that I have to worry about the flowers freezing. This is a Phalaenopsis, and they're probably the most common besides those corsage ones, altho I'd like more of those.

I actually shot this with my phone, as the sun was setting, it was too nice to let it slip away.

#@!!*)))%!!! Raccoon(s)!!!!!

2007-02-12T01:23:00.001-05:00

I tried and tried to hate you Raccoons. I tried.
I now need to go get more ducks, the ducks that lived
in the trees, who used the duck bucket daily,
my beloved ducks.

I bought the LiveTrap, I had my husband put your
favorite eggs in it. You were in the trap within minutes, you
p-i-g pig.

You snarled at me, snapped at me when I tried to give you
bread, then you decided I was ok, and took the marshmallow
that I put in your cage and use it for a pillow.

You made me laugh, and I hate you for that.

Please enjoy your new life over down by the dump, as
there are many new delights to dig into there, just don't
come back, as we put the trap back out, and all your
brothers and sisters are coming to visit you soon, as soon
as they find the trap with the eggs.

I hate that you're so damn cute.

Yours as long as it takes, Audrey

Marshmallow Pillow:

!

The Duck Bucket

2007-02-01T10:42:00.000-05:00

I had a friend give me a pondliner. I have a friend with a bulldozer, what is wrong with me??? But before that....

I found one day that 11 ducklings were in the yard. Then 6 then 5 then 3, then 2, so on that day, I decided to do something, something that would make them not want to leave the yard and meet their maker off-premises. I decided to buy a bucket, so that they could swim. They weren't tall enough to see that the horse trough had water in it, so I buried a bucket. It's a rubber bucket, maybe 25 gallons or so, but big enough that they both could get in. Now that they're grown, they can't do but one at a time, but they love it. I keep it refreshed, and Bink pulls the leaves out, and we keep it high enough so that the resident toad can swing a leg over to get out.... we found that if its cold, and the toad goes in, he is there til we fish him out.

Ducks are GREAT. If we'd known this, we'd of had them before. These just wandered in and have stayed, corn is a great bribe. They do slappy feet all over the horse pen, eating and keeping the flies down, they snap so fast! They are a bit too large for our diminuitive hawks, and they sleep either up in the oaks (where they spent the hurricane, hunkered) or they fly to meet friends at a lake behind our property. They aren't loud, they don't get toooo friendly and poop on the porch, like the chikns, and they wag their tails when they're happy to see us. One has laid eggs in a hollow cypress in the yard, but thats another story.

The pond liner will have to wait awhile, right now this is just enough.

Recycle this!

2007-01-09T09:14:00.000-05:00

I heard cans falling and shuffling under the kitchen window, and I went outside and stood very very still. Sure enough, the recycle bin was teeming with life. I waited, and a head popped out. I knew him, he was a spotted skunk. They call them civet cats here, but they are skunks. Mona the poodle had recently been doused several times by him, and the good thing about these tiny boogers is that the smell doesnt last as long as a regular skunk. Maybe 2-3 hrs. Its hell when it happens at 11 pm when you're just about to go to bed, but ok if its during the early evening hours. These things are totally nocturnal.

I left after observing it trying to make a nest or something in there. THE NEXT NIGHT (oh, I should have known) while we were outside at night doing things in the workshop, the thing went in the cat door. Bink, my 8 yr old, was already in bed, he has a sort of bunk bed, he sleeps in the top... thank goodness..............when we came in to go to bed, Mona the poodle was at point in his room, fascinated with something under his huge toy chest. Nico looked under the toy chest with a flashlight and indeed confirmed that the skunk was there. Nico had a prior relationship with the skunk, as it part-times in his woodshop, and they have had regular conversations for a few months. The skunk in essence told him to, no, no essence of skunk. The skunk yawned, rolled over and indicated that he was there for the long haul. They have a working friendship, there would be no fumes that night. He tried to cajole it out of there, it was up against the wall behind it, we didnt want to move the chest, as it would probably spook or smoosh him. We had a mess to figure out. So, Nico went to bed. He had thrown cat food at it, and it ate the cat food and curled up and went back to sleep, so there was nothing else he figured he could do. NOOoooOoo. Not me. I continued thru the night to stand vigil, it got really boring. So, I made a line of cat food out the back door, took my dogs and locked them in the studio with me, and waited. I checked once an hour or so, and at 4 am, he decided to leave. I now keep the back door shut. Thank god that Bink didn't wake up, there would have been a child too wired to sleep, and that night was long enough!

Batten Down the Hatchlings!!!

2006-08-28T07:52:00.000-04:00

No, theres no babies at this point, but one is sitting on nest, right outside my kitchen window in one of the aforementioned buckets. 15 more days. But there's a hurricane swingin round, and pretty soon we'll have to move her bucket and all, to a safer place... hmmmm ... probably in my art studio.

One hurricane we put all the animals except the horses in my studio and boarded it up. Goats, and turkeys on sawhorses facing each other over a tarp. Plenty of food and water for the 24 hours they were in there. NEVER AGAIN. We had goatie footprints 8 foot up on the walls inside, and the turkeys that sat facing each other on the sawhorses, they had no idea that they could get down, all they saw was each other. When I went to take the big tom down, his legs had fallen asleep. He was up and around in about 10 minutes, but I felt a little guilty that they were that um, dumb. Then there was the issue of all those little "smart pills" that the goaties left. They dry and roll under things, and we found them for years. Under file cabinets and anything low.

You know what smart pills are. My dad used to point to frozen rabbit poop in the winter, and tell me if I ate those, i'd get smarter next time. I never did take him up on it.

Why I haven't written.

2006-08-18T00:07:00.000-04:00

I didn't want to bum anyone out. BUT this is a farm. Things happen. Life swings in and swings out. Hawks swoop in and take food. Any food. Chickns are their favorites. Also, things get old. Horses. We had to put one of the horses to sleep a few weeks ago. I do know why people live in condominiums. I really do. Its sterile, and life and death ugliness never is allowed past the security gate. I know many people who are more sensitive to these type of events than I am, and many who are not sensitive atall. I like them both the same, its what you were raised with, and what you just plain got used to. I suppose that what i'm doing is living life for today,and documenting that day. We can't expect things to be the same forever, and we really need to talk ourselves out of that expectation. We've got our own hawks, and they chase us, but we get really good at hiding, and come out anyway, to face it. So thats what I'm doing, and altho I would like to portray everything as sunny and bright and all what I call "duckies bunnies and chickies," well, its not. But still, we plod on.

We had an elm tree, rare around here, and it went thru the hurricane well. Then, it lost its leaves, and we saw that it was all twisted up, all those long Y shaped arms were weakened. Then, when the leaves grew back, the weight of the new leaves dragged the arms of the tree down lower, and from the looks of it, the next hurricane was going to take the branches right off, and throw em. Cutting it back is the only thing we could do, andmy husband is a monkey. Has the tree climbing belts and spikes, and went right up, took a long string which he had tied to a chainsaw on the ground, and when he walked out on the now-horizontal limbs, pulled the chainsaw up, started it and went to work. It gives me a heart attack to see him on the end of branches, but he's the one in the family with all the grace.

Armadillos are Oblivious

2006-05-23T16:58:00.000-04:00

It took all the nerve I had to stand outside my studio at 2 am last night and wait to see what was rustling in the bushes. I stood rock still and waited to see what it was going to be. At first i didnt know if it was a possum or an armadillo, the shape and that long tail...but it got closer, and I was relieved, the armadillo didnt know i was there. He walked right by me on the sidewalk in front of my patio, his toenails clicking as he walked. He stopped for bugs here and there, and wandered in circles for about 5 mins til he disappeared...I snuck off chuckling and went in to bed.

The Chicken Elevator

2006-05-09T16:26:00.000-04:00

One of the chickens in the buckets on the back porch decided to sit on eggs. The other chickens still wanted to lay eggs in her bucket, and you get one irritated chicken, aside from eggs that all start at different times... so during the day, we covered her up with a screen, and kept food and water in the bucket (which she never touched) and took off the cover at night. She stayed tight while racoons took eggs out of the buckets next to her, and only left every few days to stretch her legs and get some food and water. In time, 2 of the eggs hatched, and she spent 3 more days on the nest to make sure the others weren't going to hatch, and it was time to put the bucket down on the floor. The babies were standing on mom's back, and were eager to get out into the real world.

I put the bucket on the floor of the porch and gave them water and food, and they drank and drank, and mom showed them how to peck at the food, and scratch, all the while making the mom noises, so if they hear it, they come running back. We try while they're young, to pick them up, but unless they see a need, they avoid us. The need came that night, when they found out that mom could get back into the bucket but they couldn't.

It took some patience to coax the babies from the back of the bucket, it took a fast grab the first night, a slow grab the second night, and by the third night, they individually waited their turn for the chicken elevator.

I leave some eggs in the other buckets that are still up on the pass thru bar, just in case the raccoons wander back in, I dont have to cover her at night, because if the 'coon has the choice between an easy egg and an angry chicken, they'll pick the latter. I also leave the back door open, and Mona the poodle patrols. There are 2 other chickens that sleep on the back porch as well, but thats another story for another day. (the chicken coop out back holds the other 13)

Armadillos

2006-05-05T23:26:00.000-04:00

We have decided that armadillos are not to be scorned, as are the racoons and possums. They eat bugs, and altho they make little holes all over your yard and garden, I have the reassuring feeling that because they were there, there are now several less cockroaches and waterbugs on the planet.

I came out the door of my studio the other night, and quickly stepped back in. There was riotous leaf-disturbance going on in the bush to the left of the door. I called Mona.. she came over to me, and gestured that she wanted to play. CANT YOU HEAR? There's a monster under the bush! What animal in its right mind would concentrate so hard on getting bugs that it wouldn't hear me talking to the dog? This thing was practically under my feet! And what was with the dog! I eventually called Bud, the old black lab. He took off after it, and when it popped out of the bushes, and beat a hasty exit down the driveway, I called off the dog. He came back dejected, but the thing looked to me like a half a watermelon running down the driveway, cut the long way. Half a football. Somewhere in that range. At least I knew the monster was an armadillo.

I'd seen him 6 months before, on a night like this, balmy and nice. My husband had seen him in the driveway and called me out, to stand like a wall, while he tried to catch it. I did my job, he flushed it out of the bushes, and the darn thing ran right between my legs. It was trying to see who was chasing it, and truly, they must be not all there, cause it went slow enough for me to have grabbed it. I had no intention of picking it up, but did touch it, and what a hot little football it was. His temperature was like a dogs, must have been 102, I had expected, i don't know, maybe snake-ish, with that hard shell.

Next time I just might get the nerve to pick it up. (Just to say hi, then let it go) I might just have a formal introduction to the dogs, with firm instructions not to chase or bother. They do really well with the chickens!

2006-05-04T00:21:00.000-04:00

They get
babies,
they get
testy.

MyChickenSpace.com

2006-05-03T22:46:00.000-04:00

This was a gift from my friend Smartypants

Raccoons had learned every which way to enter my chicken coop. I put rocks under the footer board, they jimmied the handle and opened the door. Possums learned how as well, so we were actually, with 13 chickens, having to buy eggs! Sacrilege!

That Christmas, my mom gave me 5 Pottery Barn Buckets, and I decided to fill them with hay and seed them each with an egg and let the chickens find them. I set them up on the passthru to my kitchen on the back porch, and it's not as messy as you'd think, the chickens only go there now to lay eggs. The other stuff they do, well, they dont do it when they're going to lay an egg. The chickens are now safe to lay their eggs and I have eggs by the back door!

My standard poodle Mona has taken to guarding the henhouse at night, so damages have been cut there as well.

I took a picture of this, and posted it on a message board, and this is what I got back from Smarty. Thanks!

What I'm working on

2006-05-01T01:41:00.000-04:00

I'm supposed to be making this into a birthday card.
I'll post it when it's done.

Hibiscus 5

2006-04-29T01:47:00.000-04:00

Hibiscus5, 12" x 12" Acrylic Painting

Who would post a recipeon their first post?

2006-04-28T00:14:00.000-04:00

I would.

Debralee's Chocolate Crumb Bars

Estimated Times: Preparation - 15 min | Cooking - 35 min | Yields - 30 bars

1 cup (2 sticks) butter or margarine, softened
1 3/4 cups all-purpose flour
1/2 cup granulated sugar
1/4 teaspoon salt
2 cups (12-oz. pkg.) chocolate chips, divided
1 can (14 oz.) sweetened condensed milk
1 teaspoon vanilla extract
1 cup chopped walnuts, optional

PREHEAT oven to 350° F. Grease a 13 x 9-inch baking pan. BEAT butter in a large mixing bowl until creamy. Beat in flour, sugar and salt until crumbly. With floured fingers, press 2 cups crumb mixture onto bottom of prepared baking pan;
reserve remaining mixture. Bake for 10 to 12 minutes or until edges are golden brown. COMBINE 1 cup morsels and sweetened condensed milk in a small, heavy-duty saucepan. Warm over low heat, stirring until smooth. Stir in vanilla
extract. Spread over hot crust. STIR nuts and remaining morsels into reserved crumb mixture; sprinkle over chocolate filling. Bake for 25 to 30 minutes or until center is set. Cool in pan on wire rack.

I have to admit it, this is a huge love of my life, and a huge part of my butt, cooking.
Whoever thought, that at this point in my life, I would desire to become a domestic
goddess. SURE as hell not me. Domestic. hehehe We don't call it Scheitstreun Acres
for nothin.

How we got the name....I have this friend, Stevie from Maine. He has a way with words that defies prediction. I can always second guess most people, yes, its annoying, but not Stevie. He came in the driveway one day, looked around, at various cars, piles of vegetation (I cut and run) and said, "Man, this place is Shitstreun!" and there you have it, thats how this place got its name. We did, out of shame clean it up. Foxworthys quote about mowing the lawn and finding a car, well, that hit too close to home, so we did tidy a bit.